No More Pirates

After Pirate Charlie Boy was found dead under suspicious circumstances, all other pirates seem to have left the tri-state area. Only fake, wannabee pirates are still lurking around. You must stay away from these impostors... they purchase their skulls from SAKS (embossed on Juicy Couture handbags and Alexander McQueen scarfs) rather than hunt the natural way for such tokens. There are also the yuppie impostor wannabee Wall St type fake-pirates who think buying bad ironic pirate art at SCOPE will get them excepted into the pirate world. Dissociate yourself from such phoneys before they attempt to take you to a misShapes show at Don Hills under the pretence of $3 beers and mixed drinks…